Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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