How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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