i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
