My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I wear drunk well.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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