The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
