i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
