I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
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