and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
