Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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