i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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