Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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