is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
