i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
