the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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