I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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