o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
