Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I have feelings that need drinking.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
