Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
This beer is not sobering me up at all
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Randomize
