weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize