So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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