I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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