I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize