But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
