How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Randomize
