Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
