Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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