I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
