After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
