He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Randomize
