God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I could fuck to npr.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
