If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize