you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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