I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize