3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
