I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
