I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
