Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize