i think my mom watched the whole time
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
