The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Non-Jews are for practice
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
