He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I need moral support for this bender
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
