I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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