I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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