he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
