they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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