return my video game
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
