google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
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