is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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