I think scott just propositioned me for sex
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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