in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
im holly from the hills drunk
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
