Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
